Tuesday, May 3, 2011

The 10 most common clichés in video games


When you play a lot you are guaranteed to bump into things that seem to repeat themselves in many games. Some may be there because there isn't any better way to do the thing in question, in some cases it can be just laziness, like "lets do it like this because others do it like so too".  What ever the reasons might be these things will make you laugh, cry, feel frustrated etc, but what they won't do is surprise you. Without further ado My little gaming blog presents the 10 most common clichés in video games.

10. Enemies drop totally random stuff

You are playing some rpg and have to kill small animals to level up. After you've killed them they drop gold, weapons or armor. What's the point in this? A rat carrying a wallet, sure. Maybe he was on his way to the bank. The other part of this cliché is when enemies with guns die and if they drop something it surely ain't the weapon that poor sucker was firing with. Can't be that hard to make them drop the real weapons.

This one  actually might drop some coins.


9. Enemies are almost blind and they have the memory of a 120 year old

This goes for games where you have to hide much, infiltrate buildings and other secret agent stuff. Firstly you always have to crouch so no one can notice you. Of course you'll become invisible when you are a little shorter. I can understand that you may move more silently but that a person can't see you from the other end of the hallway? Glasses should be mandatory for every bad guy in games. Second thing is their memory. You have been seen and the enemies start looking for you. You hide ten seconds behind the corner and everyone else seems to forget that you were ever there. Those mad scientists in games should try to come up with a cure for Alzheimer instead of those everyday death rays.

Well you can't remember it all.


8. You are delivering pizza when suddenly something happens and the fate of the world depends on you

In the beginning of the game you are doing your job or whatever like on any normal day. It's not hard to guess that that's going to change. I don't remember any game where you would really be surprised how things start to go wrong. Well maybe in Sims you get to live your days without accidents.

I've got to save the world? Didn't see that one coming...

7. Your home is in danger because of some mysterious threat

Your village is suffering from some unknown natural disaster and you have to find a way to stop it. Your city is ruled by some evil organization or company which you must stop or destroy. Your planet faces imminent danger as some alien fleet is just around the corner coming to wipe out your entire race and you have to kick the aliens back to Coruscant or wherever they came from. Oh wow, these are all really original ideas. Probably the janitor came up with them.

Watch out, invaders from space! This idea's older than jesus himself.

6. The hero is a plumber, a scientist or a teenage boy

Basically this goes along with the number 8. The world is full of soldiers but somehow it's the everyday joe who has to save the world. It doesn't matter that the most difficult task he has ever done is filling in the tax return. Teenage boy comes into the picture when talking about jrpg. The hero and his companions pretty often happen to be young. This doesn't mean they would be inexperienced or something like that. Although the hero's best friend happens to be 17 years old he still has been in numerous battles or has the knowledge of the Moscow public library.

Scientists, the coolest guys on earth.


5. The game has a sequel and your ultimate killing machine starts from level 1

You have finished the first game with your character possessing almost godlike powers, but if you play that same character on the part 2 you will somehow have lost all your powers and equipment. I remember when I read some conversations about God of War 3 (before it was released) and one of the most popular topics was how Kratos will lose his powers once again. Is it so hard to come up with a way to continue the story without crippling the hero?

It really feels like this.


4. Hard to come up with ideas for achievements for your game? Check that you have the "collect all hidden treasures"

These days almost all PS3 and Xbox 360 games have achievements/trophies. Those vary from very simple ones (shoot 5 enemies) to some hc ones which take forever to achieve (earn 100000000 points in multiplayer). But the one you will surely find in every game is the one where you have to collect all the hidden objects. Of course there are some golden medallions lying around in the jungle or old playboy magazines in every warehouse across the town. And of course you'd want to look under every rock and around every corner to find those.

Yes, I did it!

3. The final boss seems to be almost dead when suddenly he comes alive twice as strong

You can't have a boss fight without this one. It really irritates me that you basically have to kill the boss like ten times before he's finally dead. Another detail for this is that you beat the enemy by ripping his armor (or something similar) piece by piece and at the end you'll be able to attack the weak spot and kill the sucker. And during this fight the boss just becomes more and more dangerous. You'd think that a man who's been almost beaten to death would become weaker, but oh no, not in the world of games.

One of my favorite bad guys.

2. Boxes, boxes everywhere

The world is full of boxes, well at least game worlds are. Every warehouse, old factories and pretty much every room anywhere has boxes, countless numbers of boxes. Whether you have to hide or climb somewhere it's guaranteed that there are boxes. If the world has more objects than just the boxes the second one will be barrels, and not just any barrels but the exploding ones. "This game sucks! Can't get past this stupid room! There's a weak spot in the wall alright, with a barrel next to it, but I don't know how to break it. There also seems to be a way ahead up on the roof, but how can I get there with only these boxes lying around here?"

I'm soon having nightmares about these.

1. You are fighting for the freedom of the universe but still running errants for the poor lady in the gutter

You are the hero of the Universe, strongest and smartest man on the planet or just the ultimate killing machine of your time and you are working for the president of the USA/Earth/Galactic Alliance. Well it doesn't matter, as you still have to go and get the neighbor's children out of the kinder garden. One would think that a man on this position wouldn't have to do jobs like this, but still you can find these missions in way too many games. I'm just an average normal guy and even I don't like doing those things everyday, so is it a good way for the hero of the world to maintain his skills? I thought so too.

At least he's good at this.

43 comments:

  1. That's pretty much Final Fantasy in a nutshell.

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  2. I gotta say that female characters with breasts the size of small moons is the worst. Some of these games are embarrassing to play in front of other people.

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  3. yup you got it covered! I always found it weird how quill rats and Armor which is clearly much to big for them

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  4. *how quill rts in diablo 2 would drop armor

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  5. "breasts the size of small moons" - haha, you could certainly add this to the list. But it's a fantastic summery. It's surprising how unoriginal a lot of games are.

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  6. @J.R.
    That was actually one of the cliches that was on the first bigger list, but I left it out for the final one.

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  7. You take theses things out of a game and you your left with nothing.

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  8. HAHA nice!!
    Did you forget the fact that you can be fighting in the most peaceful Neighborhood in the country, and it would still be PACKED with ammo!

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  9. Haha these clichés are so true!

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  10. its ok if its fun, good eye

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  11. hahaha it's true this cliches are so funny

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  12. hahaha great article, had a bit of a laugh at number 4.

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  13. hahaha, pretty funny, and you can even find games with 3 or 4 of those cliches at the same time xD

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  14. Yes, oh god yes!

    Especially number 1, ohly fuck that one sucks.

    I just did epicly heroic things and conquered a metric fuckton of enemies all the while making sure you all live. And now you want me to deliver this basket of bread?

    +1, too funny. Follow me aswell! :)

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  15. Well i be damn thats the formula of every freakin JRPG i have played, and its sure as hell is getting boring man

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  16. The game cliche factory is unstoppable. How about arbitrary unstoppable walls? My character can reign fire and brimstone upon countless enemies, summoning supernatural beings and slicing tanks in half, but a locked chest, well, you gotta do the sidequest to get the key.

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  17. Agreed all the way! Expecially number 3. pisses me off allways when, that happens.

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  18. is funny beacause the cliches are cliches

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  19. I think that without some of these games would be less charming

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  20. Rofl at the final cliche. Its true, you're moments away from fighting the big bad, stop the invasion and still be home in time for dinner when you decide to do one last sidequest, deliver some groceries.

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  21. The last one.. gets me very time

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  22. Do you know that cliché is a french word ?

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  23. Number 5 is so true lol :P Good read!

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  24. Or the hero is a middle age white man with a bald/near bald-shaved head. There was some poster with like 30 characters that looked near identical lol

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  25. Haha number 10, gotta love it. Especially finding weapons like a big sword off of a pig, wtf was a pig doing with a sword? Pigs can't have swords!

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  26. Well the cliches depens on what kind of charackter the gamer is. Initiative gamer just push forward and don't care about best gear in game. Careful player always want to have the best gear ingame...

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  27. this was one of the most entertaining lists i have ever read. really good job. reminded me of sooo many games!

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  28. Some of them are required for the game to be fun though

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  29. wow, never thought about it like that.

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  30. Hahahha totally right! I cant imagine couter-strike without boxex :), cant imagine diablo without random stuff... but it's tooooo much for me !!! good post.

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  31. Lmao awesome post, all of these are so cliche ;D

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  32. So true. Just your average kid... with an intense knowledge in deeply secret warfare...

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